Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
True strength comes from lack of pants
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize