After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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