I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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