We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
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I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
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I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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