JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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