It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
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