Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
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