big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
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