i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
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