As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize