Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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