dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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