I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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