i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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