Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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