If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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