he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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