he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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