he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
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