Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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