went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize