I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
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One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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