Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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