You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
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I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
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Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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