He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize