so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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