I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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