Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
pop tarts are not kleenex
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
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I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
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At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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