is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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