You're my little dorito
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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