At least make sure they are 18
Why
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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