Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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