We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize