So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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