I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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