you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
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