Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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