im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize