I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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