how can u be prego again
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize