I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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