who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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