you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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