direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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