That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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