My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize