you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize