Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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