So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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