That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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